Monday, 18 November 2013

On Turning 20

(Just as a side note, I think I get exceedingly boring when it comes to my post title choices. But, really, what can I say? This is a post about turning twenty.)

I'm sitting here, writing a superfluous blog post, when I should be doing other writing, but I've decided to throw caution to the wind. It's my birthday today, after all.

It's been a good week-end. Six children sang to me, over a teddy bear cake on Friday. Greek food was et on Saturday. I was toasted with beer and wine on Sunday, and got special birthday phone calls on Monday. I know it's rather a tired, old sentiment, but really the best gifts aren't the ones you can see, feel, or (yum) taste, though I must say I'm pretty delighted with the presents I received as well. It's the friends, the new and old and unexpected. It's the prayers, and benedictions of well-wishing. I guess it's the love.

And speaking of tired and old, that's the way I've been feeling lately. I've found myself thinking many times during these last few weeks, "Am I really only turning twenty?" It seems like I've been living for so much longer than that. And, I know...Anyone who is anything older than twenty-one is thinking, "PATHETIC!" But, I'm being honest, here. This is "real life" for me.

This past week was a rather hard one - it seems like God was teaching me what it is to be humbled and say "I'm sorry" - to make mistakes and recognize my sin in jarring technicolour. I was thinking about these things when I went on a walk, today in the part rain and cloud, when I just happened to look over my shoulder and gasped. There was a rainbow, arching in the sky above me. I could see it from end to end.

It whispered "Happy Birthday" to me and I thanked God.

But, that's not all. As I stood and looked at the rainbow with something reaching awe in my heart, I glimpsed through the clouds a second rainbow. A double rainbow....

Not just enough to get us by. Lavish gifts.

In just a few seconds, they were both gone.

Life is a gift. And, like every good gift, it's a sequence of total surprises. In the friends I've made, the places I've found myself, the little things that brighten my days - it's often the most unexpected that become the dearest.

I've always admired the people who can make and keep resolutions. It's not that I don't have the willpower to stay with something. It's just that I can never decide what the resolution should be. But, walking home today, I had a glimpse of what I might just want my life to be like in the next year: Open-palmed. Taking what comes without fear -  with even eager anticipation. Life is too short for anything less than that. Whether it's a rainbow, or a rain cloud just over your shoulder God can turn it into a gift with a bow on the top for extra good measure.

- Millie


  1. Thank you for posting this, Millie! I really don't think it's fair when someone not in the same season as you are in minimizes your struggles. Because they're just as REAL as anyone else's struggles. I'm glad to hear you're learning and growing, even if it's hard. :) Doesn't God show us His Presence in the coolest ways? Your mention of the double rainbow reminded me of my own recent reminder. I've been church hunting lately, and I was rather discouraged after trying my first new church. But, on my way home, I saw the sun streaming through the clouds and illuminating the mountains. It was perfect and reminded me that I'm not alone and that God's got a plan. And he's got a plan for you too. So, keep on following Him; it'll be better than we can even imagine, right? Happy birthday, Millie!

    Oh, and by the way, I think your titles are fine. I've read at least a couple of blog posts lately that caution against using overly imaginative titles. People want to know what the post is about, so your titles are actually pretty good. :D

  2. Lavish gifts indeed. Thank you, Millie, that was beautiful. And Happy Birthday!!

  3. Happy Birthday Amelia. Yesterday I saw the double rainbow too and my thoughts went heavenward. Rainbows tend to do that.
    These posts make me thankful for our up and coming young adults. It's wonderful grace. Thanks!

  4. That's so cool that you saw the rainbows, too, Mrs. G. Which makes me thankful for something else - sweet communion in Christ.
    Thank you all for your kind comments.
    - Millie